The Cold, Hard Truth

Its been over a month since I have written on this blog because life has been pretty calm.   We have had no trips to the hospital and no extremely painful conditions.  It has been nice to have some quieter days.  

At the beginning of January, Jaron celebrated his 38th birthday.  Our views on Jaron’s birthday has changed.  Instead of feeling sad that he is getting older, we will now celebrate that we had another year with him.  So we are grateful that we were able to celebrate another year with this guy!  

 In the middle of January, Jaron finished his radiation treatments.  This was a HUGE accomplishment.  He made it through 33 treatments, 7 weeks of chemo and radiation.  We were so grateful to reach another major milestone.  Good Job Jaron! 

Next week Jaron starts chemo again.  He will do chemo 5 days out of each month for 6 months of treatment.  Cross our fingers it won't be too bad.  
 This picture shows Jaron’s hair loss.  We thought it would be his whole head but it really is just the one side.  Now he is sporting a cool shaved side.  We thought about shaving the other side so he could look like Mr. T. 

Though we have not had any major hardships this month, we have learned some important information.  In December, we met with genetic testing and they ran some tests.  They recently contacted Jaron and said they had some strong evidence that he has some mutations of the TP 53 gene.  This is the gene that causes cancer to show up a lot in certain families.  Their next step is to test Jaron’s mom and maternal grandparents.  If they can establish some patterns, then they can test our children.  This information will help them know if they need to do cancer screenings for the children.  They would start that now and monitor them throughout their lives.  It will be good to get some answers, but it is also scary to think that one of our sweet children might have to experience cancer, too.  We pray that it wasn’t passed on to them.  

Yesterday was a big day.  We started the day with Jaron getting an MRI.  Then, he did some blood work and we finished the day by meeting with his oncologist.  Jaron’s MRI looked great.  No visible tumor and no growth.  Everything looks clean and very promising.  His blood work looks great.  When Jaron’s tumor was removed, they sent it off to do some extensive testing.  This helps them know the nature of the cancer.  We had some encouraging results.  The tumor’s mutations indicate that it is not an aggressive tumor.  It could stay away for quite a few years.  With this type of tumor, Jaron could live for 10 to 15 years, maybe even 20.  When it comes back, it most likely won’t be very aggressive.  So he has some good years ahead.  We met this news with mixed emotions.  When we shared the news with others, all of the responses were so positive.  And we felt those same hopeful feelings.  When faced with the possibility of living only 2 to 5 years, being told you could have 10 to 15 years is awesome news.  But if you told a healthy man in his 30’s that he only has 10 to 15 years to live, that also seems really short.  So we feel grateful that he most likely has some time to live life and enjoy raising his young kids.  But we also are saddened that he has cancer, that he most likely will die from this cancer, and he might not live to a ripe old age.  It is a funny place to be where we feel optimism and gratitude but we also feel sadness and anxiety.  Such an unusual journey!

I was riding in the car with a friend last week and we were talking about Jaron and what I might do if he passes away.  She asked me how I even wrap my brain around thoughts like that.  Those are huge thoughts that are hard to accept but I have come to some conclusion.  Lots of people die young and a lot of the time, it is with no warning.  There is so much heartache over these tragic deaths.  The families may say things like, “We didn’t get to say goodbye.”   My own father passed away last September and we didn’t know our time would be cut short with him.  I am glad he lived a wonderful and active life, but we might have enjoyed his last months and days more if we knew he would be leaving us.  

I call this tumor of Jaron’s our warning shot.  It came and turned our world upside down.  Life has been SO HARD but we are getting back to a new normal.  I feel like I have my wonderful and loving husband back.  His health is returning.  He most likely has a few good years ahead of him before it comes back.  So with this tumor came the warning, “Hey, I am not going to take your life just yet.  So go, live, love, and enjoy life while you can.  And be grateful for the time you do have.”  With that warning shot, we now hug a little tighter, hold hands a little more, take life a little slower, and speak a little kinder.  I am grateful for each day I wake up to my sweet husband and each night I kiss him good night.  I am grateful for each “I love you” I hear him say.  I am grateful for the new perspective I have been given.  It has taught me to love deeper because our time on this earth does not last forever. 

Jaron and I have made a 7 year bucket list - things we want to do together, things we want to do with the kids, and things he wants to do alone (like hunting).  I hope and pray that we can do all of those fun things together.  Then, when our time is done here, we can say, “We really LIVED!”  

15 Year Anniversary

It was a perfect day.  The sun was shining.  There was white snow all around.  I was the smiling bride and Jaron was the proud husband.  I can’t believe that was 15 years ago!  I can remember it so clearly.  I was so happy and so hopeful.  Life was going to be great with Jaron by my side.

 

Little did we know the bumps in the road ahead.  We didn’t know we would experience things like when the economy crashed in 2008-09 and Jaron’s job relocated us to Northern California and we lost our home in Arizona.  We didn’t know I would suffer 8 miscarriages.  We didn’t know Jaron would have a brain tumor.  We didn’t know the difficulties of parenting and keeping a good marriage.  All we knew that day was we were in love.  Sometimes I wish I could go back to that innocently happy day.  I keep thinking about Garth Brooks’s song The Dance. “I could have missed the pain but I’d have to miss the dance.”  There has been a lot of hard in these last 15 years but there has also been a lot of good, the part of the dance I wouldn’t have wanted to miss.  There has been a lot of joy in bringing three children into this world.  Our love for each other has grown so much.  We have laughed together, played together, built a life together.  I am so glad Jaron chose me and that I said yes.  Here’s to another great 15 years!  

My sweet mother teamed up with Jaron to help give me the best present this year.  I haven’t worn my wedding ring for over a year.  A prong was broken and it needed some work.  My mom took my ring to the jewelers and had them fix it up like new.  It is so beautiful.  I feel like a new bride wearing it.  Thanks mom!  It is such a comfort to have my ring on my finger again.

Jaron’s treatment has continued to go smoothly.  He has about three weeks left of radiation.  They told us he would start to lose his hair at this point and sure enough, it is falling out.  It might just be in this one spot.  

 Jaron went in last week to get a breathing treatment.  His chemo makes him susceptible to pneumonia.  This should help prevent him having any problems, we hope.  

While we were there for this appointment, we met with the genetics counselor.  She said that Jaron’s family is so unique that they don’t have other cases to compare them to.  They do know of a cancer causing gene but this gene usually causes different types of cancer in the family, like grandpa has prostate cancer, uncle has colon cancer, cousin has leukemia, etc.  Because Jaron’s family has one type of cancer, they aren’t sure what gene would cause that.  So they are going to test all of Jaron’s genes.  If they find something unusual, then they will test his mom to see if she has the same defective gene.  Then, when they know what they are looking for, they can test Jaron’s brothers, our kids, and our niece and nephews.  If they find members of the family who have this same gene, then they will do cancer screenings each year.  Right now, there is a low chance that they will be able to find what is causing the cancer.  But we are hopeful because genetic testing is advancing so much that in the coming years, they should be able to learn something.

Thankfully, we have been able to enjoy the Christmas season.  My mom did the 12 days of Christmas for our family and my sibling’s families.  We had so much fun opening each envelope to see what each day brought.  We went to see the lights, watched Christmas movies, read Christmas books, bought presents, etc.  My favorite day was the day we were asked to serve each other.  Jaron played chess with Clark.  Clark helped Jaron with the animals.  Vienna played candy land with Bethany and Bethany massaged my feet.  We loved each day’s task and felt like it ushered in a good spirit for Christmas day.  Thanks mom! 

                                                    

We have been blessed with so many gifts and so much service this holiday season.  It has brought much joy into our lives.  We have continued to receive generous donations, which we are so grateful for.  Our family was also blessed to receive presents that made this Christmas one of the best!  We will always remember the kindness shown to us this season.  Thank you.  

One gift was a hand painted portrait of Jaron with his dad and brother on a fishing trip they took right before Jaron’s surgery.  They were treated to an awesome day of fishing by a dear family friend.  Near the end of the day, Jaron made a miraculous catch of a large fish.  This friend took this picture and had it made into a portrait.  What a touching gift.  

 Christmas eve is one of my favorite days.  I love the excitement in the air.  This year was extra special because Christmas eve was on a Sunday.  I loved going to church and hearing the beautiful Christmas songs.  It really brought in a feeling of worshipping the Christ child and not just looking forward to Santa.  Here is my little sugar plum fairy.  She did a great job singing with the primary children.  She loves to sing.  

 As the day neared bedtime, I have to say, my children felt like they should be on the naughty list.  There was a lot of fighting and demanding.  The kids were acting selfish and not very grateful.  

  

 Though they went to bed with happy anticipation, I was worried about the way my children were acting.  I wanted to take back all of their presents and teach them to be happy to receive an orange!

As I prepared for Christmas morning, I devised a plan.  I wanted to teach my children that presents were a gift and that they should be grateful to receive them, not just selfishly expect them.  So I hid all of their presents in 9 different locations.  When they woke up Christmas morning, all they saw was the one gift from Santa and nothing else.  Yes, there were some disappointed feelings but then I explained what we were going to do.  I had created 9 different “tasks” that brought the Christmas spirit.  Every time they completed a task, I would give them a clue to where presents were hidden.  Once they had completed all of the tasks, then they could open their presents.  If they were grumpy and complained, I would add on a chore.  After the kids got over their shock, we began the quest for presents.  

Here are the 9 tasks they had to complete.  

1. The Christmas spirit is about service.  Make a bed that is not yours. 
2. The Christmas spirit is about helping those in need.  Watch “The Coat: A Story of Charity” on youtube and then find some warm clothes to donate. 
3. The Christmas spirit is about gratitude.  Write a thank you note to Grammy for the presents she gave you. 
4. The Christmas spirit is about remembering the night Christ was born.  Watch the Nativity on youtube. 
5. The Christmas spirit is about “singing loud for all to hear.”  Sing carols at the piano.  
6. The Christmas spirit is about speaking kindly.  Compliment each member in the family.
7. The Christmas spirit is about sitting with your loved ones and reading a Christmas book. 
8. The Christmas spirit is about having fun together.  Have an air hockey tournament. 
9. The Christmas spirit is about helping at home.  Clark - help feed the animals.  Vienna and Bethany - help shovel walks.  When done, play in the snow. 

Good news was they only once had chores added onto their task.  This scavenger hunt created such a wonderful feeling in our home.  We didn’t even get to opening presents until almost 10am.  I am not sure if it taught the children anything but it definitely made a Christmas filled with less fighting and more words of gratitude.  It is definitely a Christmas we will all remember.  

 It is always sad when Christmas comes to an end.  I love this season.  This year has been particularly filled with such kindness shown our family.  Though it is over, the memory of Christmas 2017 will forever be in my heart.  Thank you for helping my family.  I love you all so dearly. 

Joni 

Christmas Card and Yearly Letter

Merry Christmas everyone.  We hope you have had a wonderful day.  Here is our Christmas card and yearly letter.  We think of you all often and say prayers of gratitude daily for your love and support.  Thank you for being the good part of 2017.  

What a year!  It seems that it just wasn’t our lucky year.  It is easy to focus on the hard things

this year...Jaron and his mother’s diagnosis of brain tumors, Joni’s father passing away….but

we would like to focus on some of the good things that happened this year.   

Jaron - This year Jaron adopted 6 baby goats that will grow up to be pack goats for hunting and

hiking.  He drove to Kansas to get them.  When he got back, our kids enjoyed bottle feeding the

goats.  Jaron also enjoyed some awesome duck hunting and fishing trips this year.  

Joni- Another year of homemaking and mothering for Joni, living the dream!  She was able to

sneak in a few trips.  In the spring Joni went to the BYU Womens Conference with her sisters.  

She loves going to this.  In the summer, Jaron spoiled Joni with a trip to Denver.  She enjoyed

the relaxing time away.  

Vienna - She turned 12 this year, earned her Faith in God Award, graduated from primary, and

moved to Young Womens at Church.  She started learning the cello.  She also has been taking

sewing lessons and is quite the baker, too.  She has probably grown six inches.  She has

almost caught up with Joni.  Vienna is becoming a wonderful young lady!

Clark - He turned 10 this year.  He is in the 5th grade.  He is still doing karate and really enjoys

that.  He is a great helper on the farm.  During Jaron’s surgery and recovery, Clark cared for the

animals.  He did a great job as being the temporary “Man of the House.”  He is also a wealth of

interesting facts.  

Bethany - She finally got to go to school like the big kids and she loves it.  She loves riding the

bus, going to recess and PE.  She loves music and library.  She is into numbers and spelling.

Kindergarten is her thing! She is still doing gymnastics, which she also loves.  Life is good

when you are Bethany!

Also this year, we were able to go on some great family vacations.  We went to California where

we fell in love with Universal Studios and The Wizarding World of Harry Potter.  We also went

to Island Park, Park City, Tony Grove, and Bear Lake.

We hope this holiday season finds you healthy and well.  As we reflect on the blessings of this

year, our family and friends are our greatest blessings.  Thank you for bringing light into our

lives.

Merry Christmas!

Jaron, Joni, Vienna, Clark, and Bethany Allred

The Lights in the Darkness

I hope you all are having a good holiday season.  I am happy to report that we are!  I am crossing my fingers and knocking on wood that things will continue as they are and we will be able to enjoy Christmas this year.  Jaron is doing pretty good.  His blood clots are no longer bothering him.  The biggest pain is the shots he has to give himself two times a day.  But that is much better than the excruciating pain he was in.  He has started back to work and is enjoying getting up and out of the house each day.  His c-Diff came back so they put him on another type of treatment.  We hope this does the trick.  He really looks good.  He still is having some word problems.  Sometimes it is hard not to laugh at it.  I think the brain is interesting and I find humor and a bit of amazement at what comes out of his mouth.  Two examples: I was driving and we were stopped at a stop light.  I was turning left.  Jaron points to the light and says, “Green acres.”  He meant to say, “Green arrow,” but green acres came out instead.  First, arrow and acres are pretty close sounding.  And green acres is really a phrase.  I thought it was hilarious that his brain forced out that saying.  So I laughing broke into the song of, “Green acres is the place to be.  Country living is the life for me.”  Second example, he told Clark, “Go take Bethany out to go potty.”  He meant Bluebell the dog but said Bethany, our daughter.  Both start with B and are names.  Clark quickly caught on and started to say, “Bethany, go out.  Go out and go potty.  Come on Bethany.  Go out and go potty!”  We had a good laugh.  I also think he has a bit of tourettes syndrome.  Bad language is a little too easy to come out.  I think he has secretly always wanted to be a swearing farmer.  Interestingly, his bad language usually shows up when I am driving.  Hmmm…. His “word finding” frustrates him a bit but mostly he pushes through.  I say to him that with my brain and his brain, we have enough brain to get through it.  I am glad I get to share brains with him.  

We have gotten into a routine with his treatment. He takes a chemo pill every night.  He goes to radiation everyday Monday thru Friday.  He will do this until January 16.  Then he will do chemo treatments for six months after that.  Treatment has become easier.  That first week was so rough…nausea and migraines everyday.  But the doctors adjusted his medicine and now he has very little symptoms from the chemo.  The radiation makes his head feel red and sore.  His ear feels a little plugged.  His main symptom right now is exhaustion.  I can tell by looking at him how tired he feels.  He went to work for six hours one day and he came home and went straight to bed.  That wiped him out.  I think exhaustion will be his main symptom from now until the end of treatment.  I hope nothing else pops up.  We can deal with exhaustion.  That is a good formula for resting on the couch with your children around you watching Christmas movies!  Our house feels happier and our load feels lighter now that Jaron is doing better.  

I am happy to report that Jaron’s mom, Malinda, is also doing well.  She has been a star patient and has sailed through surgery and treatment like a champ.  She has lost a lot of her hair but looks beautiful with her cute hat on.  She is very tired, too.  She has less than a week of radiation.  Her strength and positive attitude are inspiring.  

Here are a few of the fun things we have been doing.  

 One night we had to make an unplanned trip to Salt Lake to pick up some medicine for Jaron.  So we made it a night.  We went to dinner and stopped by Temple Square.  The lights were so beautiful.  We were touched by the Nativity.  That was a good night!

My mom is doing the 12 days of Christmas this year for her gift to us.  The first day was to get a treat and go see lights.  So we got hot chocolate and drove around the Layton Park.  The lights were cute and we enjoyed seeing them.  

Last weekend we drove down to the Gunnison/Centerfield area and cut down a Christmas tree.  We do this every year but we weren't sure this year if we could pull it off.  We were so glad it worked out.  We got a nice tree and spent the afternoon visiting Jaron's grandparents and extended family.  It was a fun day.  

Since September, our lives have felt very dark and heavy.  We have suffered grief with the loss of my dad.  We have suffered heartache with Jaron and his mom’s diagnosis.  We have been to the bottom of the barrel and back a few times with Jaron’s complications.  It is easy to be swallowed up by the darkness that surrounds us.  But in these dark times, we have had many, MANY acts of service given to our family that has brought so much light into our home.  One night we had the doorbell ring 3 different times where something was secretly left on our doorstep.  By the 3rd time, all my kids ran to the door, trying to catch the good doers.  I wanted to put up a sign that said, “Be ready to run real fast.  My kids are quick!”  We have been showered in so much kindness that are hearts are so full of love.  It brings me to tears when I think of it, and I think of it often.  The beautiful thing is no act of kindness is too small or goes unnoticed.  I have read and enjoyed every comment on social media.  I have saved every note given to us.  I have read and reread every kind and encouraging text sent me.  I have been filled with joy when I have heard our family’s name be included in the prayers at church.  Every smile, hug, encouraging word has given me strength.  Please know that we appreciate all the service coming our way.  The meals have been so delicious and much appreciated.  The gifts left at our door have brought joy into our home.  The donations, OH THE DONATIONS!  We are inspired by everyone’s generosity.  The financial burden has been lifted off of our shoulders, especially Jaron’s.  How much relief he must feel knowing that he can pay for the medical bills and his treatment.  He feels secure knowing that he can continue to provide for his family.  I have opened a separate bank account for these donations.  I am so comforted knowing that we have the money to get Jaron the help he needs.  THANK YOU, THANK YOU for donating to our family.  We will forever be grateful to you for sharing your hard earned money with us.  We recognize the sacrifice and are so grateful for your generosity.  I hope heaven showers blessings on your head!  I feel like Tiny Tim these days.  I want to exclaim daily, but often hourly, “GOD BLESS THEM, EVERYONE!”  I could write a thesis on all the good deeds that have been done for our family.  We are so grateful for them all.  I thought I would highlight a few of them.  

 My sister Katie and her husband Dan sent us this IceKap.  They meant it for Jaron but I love it too!  It has icepacks in it and you wear it when you have a bad headache.  What a great gift!

 We got an envelope in the mail with this letter.  It came from Ohio but we aren't sure who sent it.  It had an envelope of money in it.  My favorite part was how it says, "and remember: You are loved."  That warmed my heart.

My kids grow so much every year that they all needed winter clothes.  A kind family bought my children winter clothes.  How grateful I am that they are warm and covered.  

Our sweet friends Dani and Alan McKean made these shirts for us.  They say "Team Jaron" and "We are Allred Strong"  I love them.  Dani has had her own path with cancer.  Dani and Alan have been great examples of how to move forward with gratitude and positivity.  

 We are truly grateful for all the good things coming our way.  Thank you again for your prayers, encouraging messages, gifts, meals, donations.  They have been the light in the darkness.  We love you.  God bless you, everyone!
Love, Joni

Knock on Wood

Someday we are going to get to heaven and we are going to learn that “knocking on wood” really does work and all of our bad luck happened because we forgot to “knock on wood.”  Last week we had some pretty bad luck and it’s all my fault.  I kept saying, “Jaron’s doing really great and we get to have a nice Thanksgiving week before Jaron starts treatment.”  Well, the universe heard me and saw there was no wood knocking and decided to send us another curve ball.  Thanks universe!  I will be careful what I say in the future!

It all started Tuesday night before Thanksgiving.  Jaron noticed that his digestive system wasn’t well.  At first he thought it was something he ate but it continued all through Wednesday.  We thought for sure he would feel better on Thanksgiving, but he woke up Thursday feeling just as bad.  He hadn’t eaten anything in a couple of days but he was still unwell.  Poor guy spent Thanksgiving in bed, missing all of his favorite foods and his mom’s pies.  I took the kids over to Jaron’s brother’s house and we had a nice dinner.  At this point, I was very worried about Jaron.  It was hard to enjoy the holiday but the kids had a good time and that is most important.  When I woke up Friday morning, I knelt down to pray.  In my prayer I said, “Heavenly Father, I don’t know how to help Jaron but you do.  Please help me to know what to do.”  After I finished, Jaron walked in and said he was having chest pains.  It became very clear to me that I needed to get Jaron help.  So I quickly fed the kids and got us all dressed.  I settled them with a show and arranged for their grandparents to pick them up.  I put Jaron in the car and we drove to the University Hospital ER.  By the time we got there, Jaron was having a lot of pain in his chest.  Thankfully they got us in quickly but alas, it was to a small bed.  This is what Jaron’s feet look like in those beds.  

The emergency room seems like a slow moving, very uncomfortable place.  We were there all day.  Gratefully, we had a room.  It was so busy that day that patients were being treated in the hall.  So at least we got to close the door.  After doing a CT scan, they learned that Jaron had some big blood clots in his lungs.  When we got this news, I just cried.  I thought we were coming to the ER to get some type of treatment like antibiotics for his stomach ailment.  Instead now we were talking about blood clots and being admitted.  This felt scary. The Oncology team at Huntsman wanted to take over Jaron’s care so they transferred us from the University Hospital to Huntsman in an ambulance.  By this time Jaron was in so much pain.  It hurt every time he took a breath.  The pain was barely being touched by painkillers.  When they loaded Jaron into the ambulance, he looked terrible.   They had me ride with him.  As we drove, I looked out the back window and cried.  I kept thinking, “I didn’t know this was going to be our life.”  They got Jaron settled into a very nice room at Huntsman.  Finally Jaron had a bed that was long enough.  It was so nice to see him stretched out comfortable.  

The first task was to get the pain under control.  What had started as a dull pain grew to an all consuming, excruciating pain.  Jaron couldn’t breath very easy because it hurt to breath.  They put him on oxygen and gave him two types of pain meds.  That was the name of the game for Friday and Saturday: trying to control the pain.  It was a rough 48 hours.  They determined that Jaron had had a similar thing like a heart attack or stroke but in his lungs.  He had dead tissue in his lungs and his lungs couldn’t open up fully.  I really hate blood clots.  The treatment is slow.  He still has to be on the blood thinner shots and has to be on oxygen until he can keep his oxygen levels up.  While we were there, they learned that Jaron has an infection called c-Diff.  This is something that shows up in people who have a weakened immune system, often people who have been in a hospital and been on antibiotics.  This is why Jaron had been sick for a few days.  They started Jaron on treatment and he has felt relief.  After four days, Jaron’s pain was under control and so we were able to go home.  Oh, it is good to be home.  

Though Jaron had had such a rough week, they still wanted him to start his treatment.  So Monday night he took his first chemo.  He had a rough night, feeling nauseous and having a bad headache.  The next day he went to radiation.  It caused some burning sensation and a clogged ear.  Jaron was pretty discouraged because he had been told that most people don’t feel symptoms for the first couple of weeks and he was already feeling pretty sick.  After 5 days of having a bad headache, they put Jaron on a different type of anti nausea medicine, hoping this will help his headaches.  Thankfully, the nausea has calmed down, too.  Knock on wood, but Jaron seems to be feeling better and we will hopefully have a few good days.  

I was thinking about gratitude this week.  On Thanksgiving, it was hard to feel thankful when life was falling apart.  Seeing Jaron so sick just broke my heart.  How do I feel gratitude when everything is so bad?   I thought about how in the scriptures we learn to “give thanks in all things.”  I am so glad it doesn’t say “give thanks FOR all things” but “IN all things.”  I wouldn’t be able to say I am thankful for the things in my life like Jaron’s cancer or his rough recovery.  But I can be grateful IN all things, meaning whatever I am going through, I can find things to be grateful.  That I can do.  I am so grateful to my sister Stalee who rushed to the ER to be with me when we heard the bad news.  I am grateful for my sister Judi for having my kids overnight when we learned we would be admitted.  I am grateful for my brother and his wife, JB and Laura, for coming to the hospital so JB could give Jaron a blessing.  I am grateful to my mom for coming back from St. George early to run my life at home.  I am grateful to all the kind family and friends who stepped up and covered for me while we were gone.  I am grateful for the medical staff that took such good care of Jaron.  I am grateful for the many prayers that went up in Jaron’s behalf.  I am very grateful to the many generous souls who have donated to help us cover medical bills.  I am most grateful for the guidance and comfort that came from the Lord.  When I look at it this way, I can see that I do have a lot to be grateful for.  “In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you” (1 Thes. 5:18).
Love you all,
Joni

gf.me/u/fdkvxm

Happy Thanksgiving

Dear Family and Friends,

This is Joni's sisters.  We are making a guest post on Joni’s blog because we want to share with you an opportunity to help this wonderful family.  As we all want to support Jaron through this difficult time, we have decided to raise funds to help him with his medical bills.  We are so very grateful for the abundance of love, concern, and prayers offered to this family.  So many people have lifted their spirits through kindness when they’ve needed it most.  Jaron has been unable to work for quite some time, and his employers have been incredibly generous in helping their family.  We are so grateful!  Extended family has also stepped up to lend crucial support and help with their day-to-day needs.  But with the mounting medical bills that will continue into the foreseeable future, we felt that now would be a good time to ask for help.  

Jaron has a large cheering section of people who love him, especially his three young children!  We all want to support him every step of the way. We would love to ease the stress on Joni and Jaron’s mind as they get the medical care Jaron needs to fight this cancer!  As we approach this holiday season, where the spirit of giving is so strong, please think of the Allred family.  They would be forever grateful for whatever you are willing to contribute.  

If you would like to make a donation to their family at this time, here are a few ideas.

We have opened an America First Credit Union Account.  You could stop by any AFCU to make a deposit.  You can give them the name of Joni and Jaron Allred.  It is the account opened in November of 2017.  If you need it, you can get the account number by messaging Joni.  Or if you prefer, we have a Venmo account, @Joni-Allred. 

Again, we are so grateful for everyone who has been so kind.  We are thankful for all of the messages and prayers and kind deeds.  In the midst of an overwhelmingly difficult trial, it is so beautiful to see the goodness of those around us.  So many people love Jaron!!  He and Joni feel that love and support.  And they are so thankful.

Keep fighting, Jaron!  We love you!  

Love, 

Joni’s Sisters 

Joni’s update:  As they say, “No news is good news.”  There hasn’t been much to report lately because Jaron has been doing really great.  The blood clots are clearing.  The pain is receding.  He is able to walk more.  This is all really good news!  He feels like he is slowly returning to himself.  He still is tired a lot, which has a lot to with the medication he is on.  He is feeling more pain in his head because he is being weened from the steroid.  He gets frustrated with his language.  He still struggles with names and sometimes says the wrong words.  Sometimes we laugh cause he pulls up some crazy words when trying to say something.  Other times he has to take a breathe and endure the frustration. But all in all, he is making great progress and healing well.  

We have had two doctor appointments lately.  Last week we went in and Jaron was fitted for the radiation mask.  They fit this mask perfectly to his face so that when he is in radiation, he will not move at all.  As we were in the waiting room, an old man came walking out.  He had dread locks down to his waist and they were green.  I leaned over to Jaron and said I hope radiation doesn't turn him green.  Jaron thought the man looked cool.

They took Jaron back for almost an hour.  As I sat in the waiting room, I wrote this post.  

“I am sitting here waiting for Jaron to get fitted for his radiation mask. In the foyer, a talented man is playing the piano. It feels like he is playing for me. 

‘Little darling, I feel that ice is slowly melting

Little darling, it seems like years since it's been clear

Here comes the sun

Here comes the sun, and I say

It's all right.'

I hope it will be alright.”  

It touched my heart so much to hear this song.  When I posted this on Instagram, my sweet cousin commented that she envisioned my angel dad whispering into the piano man’s ear, “Can you play this song for my little girl.”  I have thought of that over and over.  I hope my dad was there.  I miss him so much.  

Today Jaron had a “set-up” appointment with radiation.  We went to the brand new facility in Farmington.  It is SO nice.  Everything is brand new and shiny.  It is comforting knowing we are getting the newest machine.  I hope that helps Jaron’s treatment.  They allowed me to come back.  I watched these sweet gals lock Jaron up on the table.  Then this big machine swirled around him.  I was a little overcome.  Sometimes it is still hard to believe what is going on but things like this make it feel too real.  Jaron wasn’t to worried about anything besides not freaking out.  That must feel claustrophobic.  But his is strong and they let him listen to music, so he isn’t too worried.

Jaron’s chemotherapy is a pill he takes every night.  It came in the mail.  That was weird to open a package and to say, “Jaron, your chemo is here!”  Brain cancer is hard to treat because it is hard to get the chemo to the brain.  So chemo through an IV isn’t as effective as a pill.  Jaron starts these pills on Sunday. Then on Monday he starts his radiation.  He will do these for six weeks.  Then he will do chemo for the next 6 months.  They say Jaron will feel pretty ok for the first two weeks but then he will start feeling more tired and will lose his hair.  This is a long road but we are hopeful it will be effective.  

My aunt brought dinner last week and said, “How are the children doing?”  I realized that I share a lot of my thoughts and a lot of what Jaron is doing but I haven’t shared too much about the children.  When the news came out, the children all handled it differently.  My 12 year old held a lot of it in.  My 10 year old threw his emotions everywhere.  Most of them were angry.  It was hard to have him be so emotional all of the time.  My six year old was very social and wanted to tell everyone about it.  Luckily, the kids seem to have calmed down and returned to normal since the surgery.  I owe that a lot to my mother.  I often say she has perfected the art of mothering.  She is also very wise.  She is as good or better than counseling.  She has talked a lot to each kid and I feel like that has helped.  They have also had a lot of fun time with cousins, and I think that helps too.  So, all things considering, I think they are doing pretty good.  Kids are strong and a little naive.  They also bring a lot of strength to us.  My six year old keeps saying, “Dad, you are going to make it through.”  I am sure her innocent faith will bring down heaven’s blessings.  Jaron likes having the kids around.  They bring him a lot of comfort.    

We are excited for Thanksgiving break.  We had a pre-thanksgiving dinner with my family last week.  It was great to have them all around us.  Jaron even made the mashed potatoes.  Tomorrow we will be with Jaron’s family.  It should be a good day.  We have so much to be thankful for.  When we were at church on Sunday, I looked around at all the people there.  I felt so much love for all of them.  I know they have been praying for us and doing acts of kindness for our family.  My heart felt full of love and gratitude to them all.  And I feel so grateful for all of you.  You prayers and support are some of the greatest blessings in our lives.  Thank you for helping us during this difficult trial.  We are so grateful for family, friends, good days, and most of all, our Savior.  We are grateful for His guiding hand and loving support.  We feel very blessed.  We hope you all have a nice Thanksgiving.  We love you!

Joni